Will I Get Better?

It’s Wednesday, so I have to work today and tomorrow then it’s the weekend. I should be happy right? Not so much.

I am down in the dumps and I am not liking myself for it!

It all started last Tuesday. I woke up feeling horrible. Just aches all over and a sore throat. I worked all day (all 10 hours of the work day)… every hour passing thankful that I survived it! I got home and had tomato soup and cheezit’s for dinner (not a normal food I eat). Then I went to bed early. At about midnight I woke up with a high fever, in a lot of pain, and talking craziness (as Chuck later informed me, once I was sane again). I took ibuprofen and sweated like crazy and broke the fever around two, not sleeping well in my wet sheets. Gross.

Wednesday morning, going to work was not an option. I called in sick and stayed in bed till 10 AM sleeping on and off. I watched the Heroes series back to back on Netflix on my computer and just laid in the bed. I didn’t have an appetite at all (VERY UNLIKE ME!) and felt horrible. At about 2 I called Chuck, I was running a fever again and wanting to be shot to be put out of my misery. He claimed that he was coming home and taking me to the MedStop. Grrrrr… I protested, but he wasn’t hearing it. I was like… what’s the point of going to the Dr. when you have the flu, they just say get rest and drink fluids…blah blah blah. So, I went against my will. Turns out it’s strep throat. I got an antibiotic and went on my way back home to rest.

Thursday I was still tired, but feeling normal enough to move around, shower, and eat something. Still not up to normal by any means.

Friday, rested again. Watched THE ENTIRE 1st season of Heroes. By the way… that show is wonderful for anyone interested. If you have Netflix you can watch it instantly. It was so well written and interesting. I can’t wait to watch the next two seasons.

Saturday, I decided, darnit I’ve been resting for 3 days, I am going to run. I intended on running 8 miles. HA… double fat HA HA. Not happening. I run/walked 5. I was quite pissed with the fact that I didn’t get my 8 miles in. Mom and Chuck proceeded to pep talk me and encourage me and remind me that I was sick and such. Still, I wasn’t happy.

Sunday, we went to the Pig Trail with the intentions of running about 6 and then riding our bikes. I think I ran for 6 minutes and quit. Everything hurt… my stomach, my head, my body. I got mad and walked. Then we didn’t even ride. I was so mad for stopping, I was mad for not feeling good. I was mad that we put the bikes on the car and didn’t even ride them. I was mad that we drove to Macon and wasted gas for nothing. I was just plain MAD. I spent most of the rest of the day sulking. We went to the pool for a few hours later in the afternoon. That was alright, but I was still not happy.

Monday I felt much better being back at a work. Like a normal human again! I had to teach spin after work. I had NO energy to do it. Luckily I only had one woman in my class and my mom in there. So we took it very easy and I didn’t even break a sweat.

Last night, I attempted to run. What do you know, about .75 into my intended 3 mile treadmill jog. I stopped. As soon as I start sweating I start feeling miserable. Like I want to tear my skin off. It is very uncomfortable. And my legs burn. And my feet hurt. All of these things that are usually normal for me are almost hypersensitive. I can’t stand it. And I’m a very heavy sweater. (Can I say sweater like that?) Anyway, I’m used to sweating, I’m not a girly girl, I don’t mind getting sweaty and dirty… But for some reason I just can’t tolerate it right now.
I quit and got off the #$*!@ treadmill and took my sorry @$$ home. I was not happy. Not at all.

I did not even pack my gym bag today. So, I guess that means I’m not even going to try to go to the gym and run. I suck. Then I’ve got the XTerra 15K trail race to do this Sunday. I have absolutely no desire to even do that race that I was looking so forward to. I have no desire to run, ride, or even eat right. I am in a BLAH. What a whiney butt I am being, I really don’t like being like this.

I’m having some job issues and that have me down as well.

I’m trying to be positive. But right now I’m am happy thowing my little pitty party I guess. Maybe I’ll snap out of it soon.